Tom Peters points to this mantra from former NFL coach Bill Parcells:
Blame no one. Expect nothing. Do something.
It's a concise, powerful expression of an attitude I try to bring to my work as a coach and maintain in my own life. I fall short constantly, but it's a mindset that I find very motivating.
But it could certainly be interpreted and delivered in a demotivating way. Sometimes when we're challenged to hold ourselves accountable and take action, there's an underlying message that's less encouraging: "Stop whining. Don't be such a wuss. Suck it up."
There's value in such a confrontational approach on rare occasions, but it can also result in a loss of trust and feelings of disconnection, which will eventually damage the relationship if repeated too often.
So why does Parcell's mantra work for me? Because when I hear it, the underlying message isn't "Suck it up" but "Make it better." And I know that if I want others to find it as motivating as I do, I need to ensure that I'm communicating that same underlying message to them.
Thanks to Tom Peters for the inspiration and the encouragement.
Photo by Melissa Gutierrez.